My name is Sparky

My name is Sparky.  Last week I was 22 years young.  I have a few things that I would like to say if you would please give an old man-cat a moment.  Please keep me warm and comfortable.  Sometimes I get restless because it is hard to get comfortable.  I would like a few places where I can get under a blanket or lie in the sun.Do not be upset if I get cancer or something.  It was nothing you did.  It was because you took such good care of me.  I got an old age disease!  If you think I am very painful please help me.  I can go to the-sacred-before-and-after moment by moment.  I may seem slow and dazed.  I am really meditating, it helps me.  I will spend more and more time there until I have to go. I will hum my mantra.  Sometimes I do not eat or drink very much.  If you think I am hurting too much I trust you to do what is best for me.  Try to find me a Veterinarian who practices Hospice care for pets.  If you want to speed up my journey, I trust you.  If you do not feel it is your right to end my life, that is ok too.  Thank you for loving me and taking care of me.  I will love you.  My spirit will be with you.  Some of me will stay with you forever.

Hello iPhone Bye Bye Moto

"i used to think i was married to my iphone,now i know it is my religion"

After 1 week without my iPhone waiting for replacement #6 in less then 2 yrs Apple made good by sending a new 16 GB 3G. I felt so helpless without my iPhone. I never realized how many times a day I would Google something of interest, check the NY Times, email, blog, or note new ideas I remembered for my book. Having returned to a Moto Razr I did not even remember how to turn it on and gave up on anything except texting. Forget the bogus www imitation. I did not realize how much my daily life has changed since I began to use the iPhone. (the only good things I can say about the Razr is that it was fun to send pictures with the texts (can only email pics on iPhone, what's up with that?) and it was small and cute. But cute don't cut it no more next to the sleek and powerful. I look forward to seeing if the GPS apps that record altitude change, distance and speed of a walk/run are accurate. I appreciate faster 3G speed but I have always thought the Edge network not half bad. It will probably be like a raise: you always seem to need the extra money. I will get used to the faster up and download times. I may be nuts (really?) but the sound sounds better. Maybe that's the new Vibe Duo earphones may be improved over the old pair I lost. I love them. I am in seventh heaven with the double memory: LOTS more music, podcasts, books and 3 movies!!! I used to think I was married to my iPhone but now I know it's my religion. ;-) @bsaunders, (you should hear my Yoga playlist!). OK time for bed...White Noise App is better then Ambien for this insomniac! Thank you Apple I am home (on Twitter) again. Bye Bye Moto, HHHEELLLOOOO iPhone!

On a Birthday

i have had another birthday.  Suffice it to say that if i am wise beyond my years, i am very, very smart.  i have learned that no matter what your denominational brand , the point is the same.  to keep going.  i think what i have learned from my own deity, sprituality, purpose is to keep going.  And, i do not mean to keep trudging along.  i mean to keep going, towards with purpose.  to keep that direction with a song in your heart.  a lot of stuff has been thrown into my path.  i was at one point really angry, really depressed.  a business gone, health gone, athleticism, gone, a following, lots of love gone.  my semming importance to a lot of people every day gone.  what mattered is to keep going.  eventually sometimes the why and the wherefore may emerge, or not.  you may be justified, or not.  it may be fair, or not.  i was judged harshly, i was seen as a blessing.  i was seen as a bad person, even as i struggled to right wrongs.  bad stuff happened, and i am happy to say now that i am glad.  i am glad that i can tell the stories and laugh at myself.  i can choose my path wihout rancor.  anger does not serve me anymore.  the hardest thing has been to give up caring that i am right.  the fact that i can now most times, not care, is proof to me beyond a doubt that god exists.  to have this wonderful paradox of being so individual, this wonderful ego that drives us to accomplish what we can, and at the same time to accept that we are just one, and we need to be happy to keep going even when it is so tough, and feel blessed to be here, is the gift.  i am sure that getting old, or curing the soul resides in accepting the central paradox of our lives, and for me still being happy to feel the sun is what my job is, after all.  to keep going, and to sing along the way.  the astonishment is so much more fun then the anger was.

the night is long tonight

the night is long tonight
yet is beautiful tonight
today smelled good
after the rain and
i learned a lot about
the press today
supposed liberal bastian
yet oddly seems to me
mostly mighty righties
with their blurred
transecting religion
and their stand on many
opnionated subjects that
strive to convert
and convince
my god is fair
my god is loving
s(he) would never
judge me unless
i decided myself
to blur the intersection
myself between god
and myself because
i know it is
not my job to
judge only gods
and not my place
in this universe
to name call
or point my
finger to
blame or name
the transgressor
and call myself
her (or his) follower
and so now
Our President is
african american
and his brilliant wife
is judged only
on which dress
she chose to
wear to her
husbands address
and her beautiful
girls sit smiling
by paradigm of
precious children
everywhere and
i do turn to
prayer yet
not know if
s(h)e is listening
now in this
beautiful clear
long night
which streaches
ahead of me
the night is long

tonight

You are responsible

Positiv_Thinkr from Twitter today sent this wonderful quote:

"Work while you have the light.
You are responsible for the talent
That has been entrusted to you"
Henri Frederic Amiel

It is wonderful the daily quotes Positiv_Thinkr
finds every day and posts on Twitter,all of them
fitting into 140 characters!

My name is Jaime and I am addicted to Twitter. (No disrespect to 12 step
programs intended, I am an addict and my life has been changed, enlightened, and
empowered by my own 12 step Recovery that continues one day at a time.)

Too bad

it is too bad that my current absence of estrogen is so omnipotent. It can withstand any pharmaceutical assault in my current arsenal. Stronger then AmbienCR it is a shame this biological firewall can not be marketed. It's insomnia reigns unscathed by any attempts to derail it's influence. Nights of non-sleep and headaches punctuated by sweats combine with violent hot flashes to render the night a tortuous wasteland stretching before me. It is too bad the extraordinary heat that hot-flashes generate can not be harnessed to provide us with power to at least charge a phone or two. imagine the possibilities of automatic power back up that could be an incredible (renewable?) energy source without the pesky side-effects fossil fuels produce. i wonder how many watts would be generated as many female baby-boomers actually lose the baby-generating and incubating ability. procreation becomes relatively impossible as the ticking clock finally explodes. I have often thought the world would certainly be a different place if these duties could be shared by men. if these hormone cycles and events were gender neutral (hmm a true conflict of that word's meaning?) I imagine there may be automatic sick time each month and then much empathy and allowances as menopause descended.

the effects of the paucity of estrogen are truly heroic. i have seen women vigorously fanning themselves and i judged them somewhat ridiculous. i have been now subjected to incredible retribution. the scalp burns as if lit on fire.this delightful and sudden incident is spontaneous and truly random. It is followed by a very fierce feeling of a flush that is amazing in it's power. Your body then tries to compensate by exploding with perspiration. It is like you become a huge extremely responsive swamp cooler. The principles of evaporative cooling are demonstrated anew as you suddenly feel the water droplets catch fresh air. First you are on fire and then feel like you are freezing. It is impossible to dress appropriately as the desire to tear your clothes off is followed by the need for expedition strength, high tech wicking undergarments. I must also mention how attractive one feels as beads of perspiration spring up on the forehead, upper lip and cleavage. This renders any makeup you may be wearing useless even if labeled waterproof.

I apologize for all the times I rolled my eyes and trivialized this occurrence in anyone in the past. I am truly sorry. I have been and continue to be duly punished! Sorry Marmie.